Episode 61 – Coffee N.5 – Build Trust and Generate Customer Leads with Amelia Sordell of Personal Branding
Lara Schmoisman 00:05
This is coffee N5. I’m your host, Laura Schmoisman. Hello back. Welcome back to coffee N5. And today, I want to tell you a little story, you know me already and you know that I really don’t care anymore what people say about me, or I, my filter is very small at this point. And I met online, this woman that she posted something that I love, and I had to repost it. And she said something like, I’m not a girl, boss. I’m not a I don’t even exactly remember what it was. But it was funny. And it shows that she had no filter either. And so I had to get in touch. And so today, here is Amelia Sordell. So welcome, Amelia.
Amelia Sordell 00:53
Thank you so much for having me. Yeah, that post went crazy. I was like, yeah.
Lara Schmoisman 01:01
Yeah, totally. I just love that you put your voice out there. And you can say what you think. And so can you tell us a little more? How do you get to this point of just don’t caring anymore. Just go for it?
Amelia Sordell 01:17
God, it’s like, it’s the thing is, it’s not like one thing is that I’m sure you can relate. It’s like, I just feel like in life, you kind of get chipped away and chipped away and chipped away and the pressure of other people’s expectations and being told what to do and what to say and how to act. And you have to fit in these cute little boxes and labels that people want to put you in. But ultimately, none of that makes you happy. And I think, yeah, I just got to a point like after I had my second kid where I was just like, I just got away when I was like 29. I was just like, fuck it like this is who I am. I’m never going to be anyone else. Why on earth am I trying to be miserable, trying to make other people happy. So I’m going to be myself. And the craziest thing is, when I started doing that, I was like, You know what, I’m not even just going to be myself. I’m going to be myself online. Which is a whole other thing, right? Like being yourself amongst your friends and your peers and your colleagues is one thing, but then trying to put out who you are aligned is something completely different. But something crazy happened, my quiet like people started saying, hey, like, I agree with you. This is really interesting and my confidence built. And so over the last two years, I’ve gone from being someone who was really scared to have an opinion to now. Like, I didn’t care. I don’t care whether you like what I have to say, I don’t care what you do. Like what I have to say, I like what I have to say. And that’s the most important thing.
Lara Schmoisman 02:36
That’s amazing. And you’re in Europe, which is a lot more open mind in the US we have the expression politically correct.
Amelia Sordell 02:44
Yeah, we have that too. But no one in the UK is politically correct.
Lara Schmoisman 02:48
Yeah, well, I hear that you really try. And when you hear people saying I stepped tried me crazy, like, Ha Ha, ha, ha, come on, you don’t have an opinion. Just say, what do you think? I mean, you don’t need to agree with me all the time.
Amelia Sordell 03:05
I were very I’m originally from Australia. So I like even less politically correct. But like, the Brits, like, we just say what we think we, you know, everyone’s really open. But we always come from a place of empathy, which I think is really important. Like, I would never, ever, ever share an opinion that I thought would hurt someone. Everything I have to say is like about important stuff and, you know, things that I feel triggered by all that impacted my life. And I think that’s the real difference is if you come up stuff from a place of empathy and from championing things as opposed to from a place of negativity, I don’t think you can ever go wrong.
Lara Schmoisman 03:37
No, of course, I mean, that you have to be respectful. And I’m not going to go online and insult someone. But I think that I mean, we are in the same business and of marketing and I feel like our they are slightly there are so many people marketing themselves themself wrong. And they’re going to be very short lived these careers, like everyone is a coach. And I mean, you don’t need to have a trajectory to teach something. I’m a former professor, and I earned my place of teaching by having many years of experience. So But still, I mean, I had a curriculum, I had a syllabus that I had to go through, and but this life coaching so so I don’t understand where did you learn all that? Where is your syllabus? Where is your curriculum? That drives me nuts?
Amelia Sordell 04:37
Yeah, I completely can relate like, it goes back to that whole thing of like people wanting instant instant gratification, right? Like, it’s the reason why young people go to Instagram to try and find career inspiration or everyone wants to be an entrepreneur. Everyone wants to make money and be a trader like all these things. And I genuinely believe giving ourselves labels like it might not even be code you might be that you call yourself An expert or guru, or, you know, whatever it is that you brand yourself, you’re actually putting yourself in a box that limits your your possibilities, that limits your potential by saying, Hey, I’m a coach, and I don’t, because you’d have no credibility. No one could take you seriously, unless you have the things to back up what you’re saying, there is that saying, isn’t it, if you’re gonna talk the talk, you have to walk the walk, which is one of the reasons why I’ve managed to build my business, I practice what I preach every single thing that we do for clients, I’ve done myself and still do for myself, I’m still on the ground, doing all the marketing tactics that we implement, and the businesses that we work with, for my business and on my personal brand. So you can never turn around to us and say, well, hang on a minute, you’re telling us to do this thing, but you’re not doing it. Because I wrote the playbook. I built this strategy from the ground up.
Lara Schmoisman 05:45
Oh, my God, there, my sister from different mother would do either Exactly. The same is like, of course, I mean, and I’m always on the ground working with my team, I have a large team, but I roll my sleeves up. And I work side by side with that.
Amelia Sordell 06:00
It’s really important to have your fingers in the pot in the trenches, right, like be on the ground to knowing what what’s happening otherwise, otherwise, how can you advise people on what the best thing is to do? Right, like the greatest travesty, I think right now in the world, aside from like, the pandemic, and everything that’s happening is like, we have all these people that are heading towards retirement and maybe like a slightly older in age, and they’re, you know, getting towards the end of their careers. And none of them have any digital skills, because they weren’t on the ground, helping their team absolutely learn and progress and be innovative, they will open that ivory tower in their boardroom looking at spreadsheets, like doing the classic kind of john Draper, you know, Mad Men stuff. And actually, that’s not relevant anymore. The CMOS are being replaced with Chief growth officers like innovation officers, revenue officers, like these people know how to do the jobs that they’re leading teams of people to do. And ultimately, like all of these people right now who are out of work and have been made redundant over the pandemic, who are senior, are going to really struggle to find new jobs, because they don’t have the skill set that the modern day requires them to, because they got really comfortable. And maybe that was maybe that was the only option they had, maybe they didn’t have the kick up the bomb that they needed to go and learn those digital skills. But like, quite frankly, who wouldn’t in this time, like,
Lara Schmoisman 07:20
Well, no, I mean, and you’re talking about people my age. And I think that’s one of the things that really separate me from my age, I cannot even say that I feel peers, my peers are all much younger than me because I kept myself relevant. And I kept myself studying. Oh, we’re going digital. So I learned to learn some coding, because if I go no go to work with a developer. I had to keep myself on my toes. And you’re totally right. I feel like that a lot of people are stay behind. And it’s really hard to catch up now. or impossible even
Amelia Sordell 07:56
So hard. I had this conversation actually with a client the other day, he’s a tech founder in Israel. And we were talking about the concept of university and how actually, the concept of university as it currently stands fails everyone, because it’s this idea that you pay a couple of $100,000 to go to school for three years, and poof, you have all the skills that you need for the rest of your life. The reality is you that’s not what happens.
Lara Schmoisman 08:18
Amelia Sordell 08:19
Knowing all the theory and none of the practice on
Lara Schmoisman 08:22
What lately what likely is happening. Also, all these people are leaving the university because they paid so many, so much money that they come out in title that have the title, now I need to get a great job. They don’t want to start from the bottom,
Amelia Sordell 08:34
For sure. But the thing is the way that way of working like and teaching doesn’t actually serve us how we should be doing University is not all three years or four years up front, it should be split over the course of our lifetime. So we go back to school every couple of years, we go back and learn new things every couple of years. Because not only do you then have the humility to start from the ground, right? Like I My first job was like sweeping floors. Like literally I was the postcard of the tea girl, but like whatever it took to like get myself with my peers. But it means that you’re constantly learning constant, constant constant. So you never get to the stagnation period, right? career is not linear anymore. You can’t just rely on your previous experience to get a new job. You have to display the skills.
Lara Schmoisman 09:20
That’s so interesting that you say that because there’s also this trend. And I tell this story in the past I my life was wasn’t linear at all. I work in production in writing in television, and film, and then I got thrown in marketing, and which made completely sense for everything I did in my life. And at some point in my life, I needed to go back to work. I need the money. We were a young family, and I just put a resume together with everything that I’ve done, which, by the way I was for many years, but the world was changing. So I want to this recruiter And she’s specialized in ad agency because it made sense for me to try to go work in other agencies with all my skills, and she said, she’ll stay home with your kids, nobody’s gonna pay you for anything. Because you don’t have that linear career, you weren’t growing from one place to another. And what she didn’t realize is well, thanks to that, and that I didn’t get the job. I’m here now with my own agency. But I, at the same time, I realized that they were wrong, that my skills weren’t valid, that what I learned, and because I did all these different kinds of jobs, prepare me for more. And even though she said that I won’t find the job I did found the job was in private agencies. And I found that toxic that it was really, really hard to work on. And at that time I read an article it’s called there is no not dickheads on the workplace. I don’t know if you’ve ever read that one. I should google it for it for you, and it makes total sense. I think that was a moment that for me it click because this guy was saying that the best meetings happen in the hallway, the best meetings happen in the kitchen. So that closed door policy was ridiculous. He says you cannot grow from there you cannot as a company as a culture you need as a boss you need to be working with a team because everyone can see the client or the job from their point of view and with their knowledge and if you hire someone is because you you’re trusting those people skills.
Amelia Sordell 11:55
100% I have a theory that the best leaders in the world aren’t the best leaders in the world they are the they are okay at many things that okay, at management that okay at their skill set, like the marketing or the spreadsheets, if you’re a finance manager, whatever it is, they’re okay at communication that okay, but it’s because they have all of those skills stacked up on top of each other that makes them the best leaders in the world. It’s not because they’re great at leadership, it’s because they’re quite good at a lot of different things. And that’s ultimately exactly what you’re saying.
Lara Schmoisman 12:26
Yeah, and absolutely, even the motherhood give you so many more skills.
Amelia Sordell 12:32
Oh my god, yeah. I learned more from being so my kids are two and four. Right? So I have small children. I learned more from being a mother than I did in the like previous 10 years of my career, like empathy, patience, emotional intelligence, negotiation, sales skills, project management skills, how to meet hard deadlines, how to juggle a baby and like eight other things at once, like, return to work parents are the greatest undervalued talent pool of all time.
Lara Schmoisman 13:02
And honestly, that’s something that I shared that all those skills you can put it in your resume, just to deal with a sick child when you have to work that teaches you how to work in a crisis. And it gives you so many skills and I I can assure you that now me as a mother have 14 and 17 years old that they are alive and kicking which I’m very proud of. I I feel like that’s gave me skills that and I still do things even though one is in college I get to remember to ask about their classes are so your mind teach you how to be a lot gives you more power to your mind.
Amelia Sordell 13:48
Yeah, I agree. No, I I really think that return to work. Parents like parents coming back from like paternity or maternity leavers are the most underrated talent pool globally. Like employers are just missing out on great people because they have a stigma associated to people because they took a career break like you’re here because your mom or dad to her career break. Like, come on. It’s ridiculous.
Lara Schmoisman 14:11
Well, actually, my mum didn’t take a career break because at that time, you couldn’t actually
Amelia Sordell 14:17
I actually had that’s a really bad thing for me to say I took three months with my son. So it wasn’t very long. But the reason I came back so quick was because I thought I would have that stigma. I thought I would struggle to get back into my career. So
Lara Schmoisman 14:29
I took one day with both of my kids because I was working as a freelancer and otherwise I will call.
Amelia Sordell 14:35
You don’t get paid, right.
Lara Schmoisman 14:36
Yeah, exactly. So you have to keep going. And but I’m still alive, and I’m still okay. And you know what, I think that those things also teach you to be resilient.
Amelia Sordell 14:49
Yeah, for sure. There is no skin tougher than a mother. I can tell you that.
Lara Schmoisman 14:54
Yeah, absolutely. So Amelia, I know that it’s like they are and I want To ask you three tips, I always end up with three tips, three tips, how to be yourself three tips how to stop caring about the other ones, and follow your gut that you can do it.
Amelia Sordell 15:15
Three tips on how to be yourself. I think the number one thing I tell everyone to first of all, it comes from confidence, right? If you’re confident you are naturally yourself, I feel anyway. So the best piece of advice I can give anyone is you need to start getting comfortable with no you need to have Be confident with people disagreeing with you and telling you know all the time. And the easiest way to do that is every single time you go and buy something from a store, you ask for a discount. Like, I know, it sounds crazy, but you literally go to the clothing store, you got azzaro wherever you buy your stuff, you say they bring it off in the towel, and they say, hey, that’s $300 you say can I have a 10% discount? And they’ll say, oh, either yes, if you get a nice woman or a nice guy, or they’ll say no. But the thing is nine times out of 10, they’ll say no. And that building of resilience of people saying no to you, and you having to have the confidence to ask something that most people don’t have the confidence to ask, make such a difference to your confidence, like, Oh my god, I love that. You feel like empowered. So like, you’ll just get you will go and ask for discount everywhere after two weeks, which is great, right? Because you’ll save money, but you’ll also have this confidence thing. And with that confidence comes your ability to then take that confidence that you have in yourself and apply it to the rest of your life. So instead of asking for a discount, when you go to Starbucks, you’re now telling your boss that actually I don’t agree with your strategy here. And here’s why with data, I actually suggest we do it this way instead, where you would have normally not had the confidence to do that. Because you don’t have that resilience built up yet. You don’t have that. That exposure to know. Right. The exposure to no piece is so important. And I think when we train our society and our kids to constantly be told Yes, like, you know, constant constant. Yes, yes. You can have that darling. Yes. If you do this, I’ll give you that. And it’s always Yes, yes, yes. But we need to train ourselves to also deal with no, because it’s the yeses. Don’t teach us anything, but the noes do, right. So train yourself. Ask for a discount. Yeah, it’s not three tips, but it’s one good one I feel so over, okay. Ask for a discount everywhere you go. Another tip as well. If you’re interested in doing social media and you want to build your confidence up, it’s a similar kind of concept. Put your headphones in and just film yourself like talking to camera down the road. And just be okay with everyone staring at you thinking you’re an idiot. Because I will also really build your confidence up. And honestly, that’s how I did it was those two things. And now I am. So like I am so I love myself. I love my opinions. I’m not always right, but I’m right for me. And I think that’s what really matters.
Lara Schmoisman 17:52
And I think also it’s okay to don’t always look your best and don’t look perfect. What I like, like, what do you have to say it’s more important that how you look. And
Amelia Sordell 18:05
100% 100% I did a post a couple of weeks ago about 21 things I would tell my 21 year old self. And one of the things was, your brain is more important than your weight. Like it doesn’t matter. It’s so much more important than any
Lara Schmoisman 18:22
And you help because honestly, if you’re keep taking care of what everyone thinks of you’re on all what the society expects of you, and your body and your image you just need. It’s going to affect your health somehow. So
Amelia Sordell 18:38
Here’s a fun fact right? For anyone that doesn’t enjoy working out the minute you stop trying to work out to impress other people. And the minute you start working out to make yourself healthy to look after your first principle, which is your body is the minute you’ll start enjoying it and the minute you’ll start going all the time because it then becomes your priority because you’re putting yourself first.
Lara Schmoisman 18:58
I’m still working on that one. I still hate to work out.
Amelia Sordell 19:02
You need to find the right thing. I do Pilates, so I love it. Obsessed.
Lara Schmoisman 19:07
Okay, maybe I’ll try that. I let you know how it goes. So thank you so much for being here. I was lovely talking to you and to have another opinionated woman and unapologetic. I love it. Thank you so much.
Amelia Sordell 19:22
Thank you for having me. I loved it. We should do it again.
Lara Schmoisman 19:25
Anytime. And people. See you next time and Coffee N5 was so good to have you here today. See you next time. catch you on the flip side. Ciao ciao.